In the Club

Here it is. Saturday night in SF with the man, the legend, Penny.

When last we left our heroes, Bruce was supposed to be meeting up with Rafe in San Francisco for a birthday party at a bar. They last spoke at approximately 7:30pm

Outgoing text message from Rafe's cell phone, 9:38 pm: What's your deal?

Incoming text message from Bruce's cell phone, 9:57 pm: fighting stepbrother over chick at bar. be in touch soon.

Outgoing text message, 10:00pm: Go get her.

Incoming text message, 10:05pm: winning. will call either way.

Rafe heads from birthday dinner to birthday party in Marina, yuppie capital of San Francisco. White striped shirts and chinos abound. Coincidentally, Rafe goes to bar and sees one Jerry Rice in the bar. He is in town for his number retiring ceremony the next day. All of a sudden he is glad to be on guest list, and not outside with the throngs waiting for #80 to come out.

11:15pm. Bruce calls Rafe, says he is being driven by girl from Berkeley to San Francisco. Bruce has now gotten a girl he just met to agree to drive him over five miles of water to drink with his friends. Well played Bruce.

11:45pm. Rafe is now at downstairs bar, which is less classy, but has beer pong tables, which is nice. Bruce calls again, he is lost. He gives cross streets, he is one block from Rafe's house. That is not good.

12:00pm. Rafe is forced to go to Gravity, world's cheasiest dance club. Bruce calls again, he is getting close.

12:15pm. Into Gravity. Hot, sweaty, asian, dancing, double-fisting jack and cokes, this might not have been the best idea.

12:25pm. Bruce arrives. With girl. Bruce is wearing HUGE backpack, he attempts to dance to Back That Ass Up. Innocent bystanders are hurt. Bruce hates Gravity. Here's a photo:




12:30pm. Rafe asks Bruce if he wants to leave. Bruce agrees. They leave club, cross velvet rope, and head down sidewalk. Bruce notices Rafe's beard. It is absurd, Rafe agrees. But, women, and his woman, seem to like it. Rafe informs Bruce he is growing the beard because he has to have a mustache for a party in December, whose theme is Robert Goulet. Hundreds are expecting him to have a mustache, Rafe does not want to disappoint. (Check out the party at WWW.MYSPACE.COM/LE_DOJ) Bruce makes night at Roxbury joke, and Rafe imitates the dance, his girlfriend is not amused. See picture below:



The four: Bruce, Rafe, two women, pile into some foreign sedan and head to girlfriend's house. Beer is drank, pizza eaten, Bruce and girl go to roofdeck to "check out the view." Shit talking ensues over the basketball showdown. Bruce threatens elbows and his crafty veteran tricks. Rafe keeps asking over and over, "how many basketball pins did you have on your Vineyard V?" High school never ends.

Finally, it's into a 1985 Corolla to hitch a ride back to Rafe's. Rafe does not fit very well, because...

There is a massive plant in the car.



There is also Bruce and lady friend in car



There is also Bruce's hand, up to no good behind the bush.



Back at Rafe's, the sound of techno emanates across the apartment. It is like being in a washing machine with shoes on the spin cycle. It is....The Duke. It is also....The Duke and a lady friend. Bruce knocks on Duke's door, then knocks again, then again. Finally, a voice is heard, "Hey there." The door does not open, the techno music is turned up. Bruce and his friend are serenaded to sleep on the carpet by the steady hum and vibration of euro trash's greatest hits.

The next day, basketball does not happen, and Rafe's four years without getting sick from booze streak ends. There is no trophy, just Bruce saying "you sure you still got all your organs left. That one sounded violent."

Coming next: Wednesday night with Tarheel fans, and Friday at the courts. Stay tuned...